Tag: writing excerpts

Weekly update. Week of May 11th

This week I wrote 6,959 words bringing the total count up to 90,355 words.

I am beginning to feel the structure of it a bit and I seem to be in the final part. All the planning and work that leads them to the final battle is underway.

Since I don’t wish to give too many spoilers, I am going to be a little more careful with the excerpts. They’ll have to be shorter. Not too good at hiding my cards just yet. I’ll have to rework a lot of it in the next draft to make the blatant bits more foreshadowy.

At any rate, here are some snippets:

             Zuriel staggered out of Agur’s study on quivering legs. It had been a long discussion. The content of which had left him deeply shaken. He started slowly down the hall then stopped as his stomach pitched again. He had already lost his dinner in Agur’s study. He stood still with eyes closed, taking deep breaths until it passed. He reminded himself that it would not be tomorrow. It was soon, but it was not tomorrow, or the day after. He swallowed hard; he wasn’t ready.

             He continued on slowly. Agur had been right about how badly he wanted to tell Aila. She had already suffered so much in her life, the idea of letting this hit her with no warning was loathsome to him. It also meant carrying the crushing weight that had just been laid on him alone. He held his hand out, it was shaking. He closed it into a fist and continued walking.

              “I should go. Its late. You need to get to sleep.” She patted his arm, nestling against him affectionately.

              “Stay.” He buried his face in her hair. He felt better with her here. If she stayed, he might actually get to sleep.

              “Stay?” Aila pulled back. “Zuriel, I can’t stay. I shouldn’t be here this late as it is.”

              “I’m not going to try anything. I really need to sleep. I just,” he paused. How much could he say without inviting questions he couldn’t answer? How much of the fear churning through him could he get away with showing her? “I’d feel better if you stayed. Keep my mind from working through the hours I just spent with Agur.”

              Aila sighed, placing her hand on his face. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”

              He took a deep breath, resigning himself to the night ahead. “You’re right.” He forced a smile. “You usually are.”

              Aila studied his face a moment. She could feel the fear radiating from him. He was trying to be brave for her. “We’ll talk tomorrow, okay? Maybe find me for lunch. You should probably sleep through breakfast.”

              If he fell asleep at all. “Yeah. That’s probably a good idea.” He stood up with her. “I’ll walk you to your room.”

              “I’ll be fine. Go to bed.” She said, turning to stop him from following her to the door.

              “Good night.” He pressed her hand before she turned and walked quickly to the door leaving him standing alone in the dark room. He walked slowly to the door, turned to lean his back against it and allowed himself to slide to the floor.

             “Hm.” He realized suddenly that he had been working out plans under the assumption that he would do as Agur asked. “I think I have.” He gave a tight smile. “No one knows yet.”

             “Was I supposed to?”

             “Of course. You are half the reason Agur felt it appropriate.” He tightened his grip on her hand slightly. “Do you agree?”

             Aila drew in a deep breath. “It’s a lot. I never thought I would be this close to everything. Its not a power or responsibility I would have sought out, but I will face it with you.”

             Zuriel stopped walking. Their linked hands caused Aila to stop and turn toward him. “I don’t want to drag you into this, or force this on you. I know this isn’t exactly what you signed up for when I asked you to marry me.”

             She looked at him as he stood waiting her response. He looked somehow more open than she had ever seen him. Once again, willing to give her up should it be what was best for her; terrified it would be. Aila stepped toward him, taking his other hand. It was several seconds before she met his eye again.

             Though the sorcerers were at first hesitant to engage Aila with any real effort, she quickly showed herself capable, bring more out of them as she laid them out in turn.

             Fintan hit the ground for the third time with a grunt. “Ugh!”

             “You gotta watch your feet when she links to the earth.” Zuriel teased the sorcerer. Of the four, Zuriel found him to be the most pleasant. He was eager and open to learn.

             “She goes so fast.” He said, accepting Zuriel’s hand to regain his feet.

             “Its been my job to keep sword men on their toes.” Aila said, rather pleased with herself.

             “More like on our asses.” Sulien said with a laugh.

             “Same thing.”

             “Again.” Cyrus called, bringing them back to their stances.

Excerpts

Because I am off of work this week, I am writing 1,500 + words a day which is going to leave a massive weekly update if I don’t off load some of the bits I would like to share, so here are a few high lights from this week so far:

           Zuriel watched her as she turned back to the trees where she had come. There was a small path that hadn’t been there before. After a brief hesitation, he followed her.

             “Are you alright?” He asked as he joined her in the clearing the path led to. It was familiar somehow, but he couldn’t put his finger on it.

             Aila turned, her eyes moist. “Today was her birthday.”

             Nydia. She was rebuilding the pond in Nydia. His heart dropped. He went to her, taking her in a hug as she allowed herself to fall apart.

             When she got her composure back, she drew away drying her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

             “Nothing to be sorry for Aila.” He rubbed her back before dropping his arm back to his side.

             “She would be half way through her fifth decade.” Aila looked sadly at the beginnings of the pond. “At least she made it longer than our sisters.” Her lips trembled with a new wave of emotion. “I know I shouldn’t indulge in this misery, but I feel so guilty. I don’t see why I should still be here when everyone else is gone. It seems wrong to just go on.”

             Zuriel took a cautious step closer, considered laying a hand on her shoulder, but decided against it. “I don’t think they would want you to be stuck. I think they would want you to go on.”

             Aila nodded, fresh tears spilling from her eyes. “She was so excited to have found you.” She smiled at him through her tears. “She wanted to come back home.” She turned back to stare into the water. “I am almost glad she didn’t have to come back and see how much Vale has changed since we left. She was strong, but there are memories here that have nearly gutted me.” She shook her head. “They might have destroyed her.”

             Zuriel looked at her as she stood with her arms folded across her stomach as if she were cold. A thousand things crossed his mind to say. That she was strong. That he would fix it. He wanted to tell her how much of his strength he drew from her. How she had begun to color everything he saw. He felt as if his heart throbbed with her pain.

             He opened his mouth to speak several times, but found nothing that came to mind truly appropriate. The idea of telling her he would do anything to make it better ran through his mind. But that wasn’t the right thing to say. Not to her.

             Aila straightened, drawing her shoulders back. “I guess I have no say in the matter though. I still have the command Zelena gave me. I am light. I don’t get to give up.” She turned around, a shaky smile on her lips. Her eyes sparkling with tears. Not thinking to hide his emotions, she read them plainly on his face. “Thank you for coming out to check on me. You’re a good friend.”

             “Yeah. No problem.” He dropped his eyes and did his best to set aside the emotions that raged through him. Her composure gave him room to be angry with himself for feeling them at all.

             Aila looked back over the pond she had started. She remembered how Kyra had sleep the first week. She had built the pond and started a field around it before she awoke. Trying to put as much beauty into their new home as she could. Knowing it would be little relief to the darkness in Kyra’s mind after Zelena’s death. But she had to try. All of Vale was shrouded in darkness now. Though she felt her light was dim and useless in the expansive black, she still had to try.

           “Zuriel, come on! You can do better that this.” Aila said as she dropped the tip of her sword in dirt.

             “I know, I know. I just…” He shrugged.

             “You just what?” Aila looked at him a moment. “You don’t want to hit me. That’s the problem isn’t it?”

             “Of course, I don’t want to hit you. I don’t relish the idea of hitting a woman.”

             “You asked me to do this.”

             “I know, I know, and it’s helping. It’s nice to just focus on the moves without worrying about Cyrus tripping me or throwing in some new move he has never showed me.”

             Aila shook her head, annoyed at his behavior. “You keep saying that you don’t think I’m helpless, and then you freak out about dropping me or hitting me with a sword that can’t hurt me.”

             “Cyrus hits me all the time, I know it can hurt.” Zuriel feebly tried to defend himself. The obvious discrepancy between what he said and how he acted felt out of his control.

             “Zuriel.”

             “Look, I wouldn’t put my all into a sparing match with Halvar either. Or Michael. Or anyone I respect.”

             “You do it with Cyrus.” She planted her free hand on her hip.

             “That’s because he makes a point of pissing me off so I will fight him.”

             Aila looked at him with furrowed brow a moment, “What?”

             “He makes me mad. Pissing someone off is an earth expression.”

             Aila nodded. “Well, I don’t want to make you mad, but I can’t help you if you are holding back.”

             “You aren’t supposed to be a difficult opponent anyway.” He argued, realizing immediately that it was not the right tact.

             “Oh? Well, you can fight a post then.” She thrust her sword into the dirt and turned away.

             “Aila, wait.” He sheathed his sword and jogged after her.

             “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to imply you are a push over, or anything. I just need someone below my level so I can focus on muscle memory. Please.”

             Aila huffed, searching his face a moment. “You can’t train your muscles to hold back.”

             “Fair.”

             “Are you going to stop holding back?”

             “I am going to try.”

             Aila thought a moment, a grin emerging on her lips. “You said Cyrus trips you right?”

             Zuriel paused, not sure he was liking where this was going. “Yes.” He said finally.

             Linking to the tera, Aila took on the fearsome appearance of it, gaining two inches of height. “Alright, every time you hold back, I am going to move earth at your feet. Hold back, you go down.”

             “And when I learn to not hold back, you leave my foot work alone?”

             “Yes.”

             Zuriel put his hand out which she took with a smile and a firm shake.

             Aila returned to her sword, drawing it from the dirt and they returned to their matches. Though it was still sometime before Zuriel could push himself past the urge to hold back from her, he eventually managed to push farther with each match.  

             “Ah, you found a new teacher I see.” Cyrus said after watching their match unnoticed for a moment.

             Aila jumped, turning to Cyrus, eagerly seeking to meet his eye.

             “She’s helping me build up my muscle memory.” Zuriel said with a smile sheathing his sword.

             “Oh, she could probably,” Cyrus began but stopped when Aila finally caught his eye and shook her head slightly so as not to be noticed by Zuriel. Cyrus looked at her confused a moment. “Aila could be quite helpful.”

             “Not that I don’t appreciate your methods, having someone I don’t have to worry about surprising me helps.”

             “Someone who won’t surprise you?” Cyrus looked at Aila with a smile. Aila shook her head again. “Right.”

             “I mean if I keep practicing, I could get to his level.” Aila said calmly, still holding Cyrus’ eye.

             Cyrus stifled a laugh, stroking his beard to hide his smile while he recomposed himself. He finally turned and winked at Aila who looked relieved. “Well, I am very glad he has found someone on his level, but its my turn now.”

             “Thanks, Aila.” Zuriel said as she started away.

             “Yeah. I’ll see you later.” She smiled and continued on, her heart still racing from the exertion as well as the nerves of nearly being outed.

             “You are warmed up then?” Cyrus said with a gleam in his eyes that Zuriel didn’t like.

             “Oh no.” He said, reaching for his sword as Cyrus started in on him. He deflected the strikes, keeping focused on Cyrus’ movements to anticipate his next attack. He was deeply irritated when his heel struck a block throwing him on his back.

             “Cyrus! I can’t see what isn’t there!”

             “The block is there.” Cyrus said calmly.

             “I know, but I can’t see it even if I was looking for it,” He stopped, taking a breath.

             “I have to make this difficult, Zuriel. When you are out on the field, the people you are fighting will actually be trying to kill you. You need to watch where you are going while anticipating the moves. And it won’t be just one, there will be tens attacking you at once. Now get up and reset.”

             “At least when Aila did it I could see the obstacle.” Zuriel said in a low voice, dusting himself off.

             Cyrus perked up. “Aila put obstacles for you?”

             “Yeah, I was holding back, so she started pulling up the earth at my feet if I held back.”

             “Wait here.” Cyrus put his sword away and hurried out of the courtyard, leaving the rather confused Zuriel to wait, working through a few thrusts until Cyrus returned with Aila.

             “Alright, you want to see the obstacles, you can see the obstacles.” Cyrus gave Aila a look as she linked to the earth and took a seat on the bench.

             Zuriel glanced at Aila then back and Cyrus. “So, she’s just going to put obstacles at my feet to watch for?”

             Cyrus smiled and drew his sword.

             After several matches, Cyrus was pleased to find Aila not only got him to watch where he was stepping, but had the added effect of keeping his outbursts to a minimum. By the end of the hour, Zuriel managed to force a draw.

             “Okay,” he sat up, reminding himself it was his duty as a friend. “I have been watching you and Aila.” He looked at Zuriel who nodded, beginning to understand. “I just wanted to make sure you knew that she isn’t available.”

             “She has to marry a nymph. I know that.”

             “Oh,” Halvar said, visibly relieved. “So, you aren’t trying to pursue her or anything?”

             “Halvar, I have so many things to worry about right now, the last thing I need is a girlfriend.” Zuriel forced a smile and reminded himself that Halvar would not read his mind even though he could.

             Halvar nodded. “Yeah, it’s just, I do know you really well and I can tell when you like someone.”

             “I mean, of course I like her. She’s pretty, she’s fun, she had been a friend through a really weird time in my life, I think it would be weird to not have a bit of a crush?” Zuriel hoped Halvar would buy his down play. He hadn’t been able to convince himself of it for days now.

             “That’s fair.” Halvar nodded, taking a drink of water. “I just wanted to make sure you knew. You’re a lot younger than you realize, you know? You’ve got like, hundreds of years to settle down.”

             Zuriel smiled. “Yeah, I think I’m just going to worry about the whole going to war thing for now.”

             “Yeah,” Halvar said with a grin. “That’s wise.”